Slowing down is especially important at this time of year as we move towards the Christmas period when things inevitably get hectic. Here's an article from Leo Babauta from zenhabits.net with some wise words about slowing down when you feel that it's all just a bit too much.
When Your Plate is Too Full
By Leo Babauta
Do you sometimes (or always) feel like you have too much to do and too little time to do it?Consider an email I got from a student the other day:“… as the semester goes by, the harder it is to keep up with school. The thing is, I know I’d be able to do it if I didn’t have any extracurricular activities. I have a weekend job where I teach youths, a youth group where I currently lead social justice, and I was just asked by someone to lead prayer group. Right now, the only way to do everything is to sleep less and work more, but I noticed that I can’t do much when I haven’t gotten much sleep. I wanted to take care of my body as well so I’ve been sleeping normally these past few days. Now I’m behind everything again; I have two big assignments due and midterms next week.”
I know this feeling, because that’s how I felt before I started simplifying my life. I was being pulled in all directions, and never had enough time for everything I needed to do. I wanted to do a great job with each role I’d taken on, and felt I could do it, but really I was doing a bad job at everything because I was stretched too thin.
To this student, and to everyone else who feels this way, I’d say this: your plate is too full. You have too much going on. The only answer, unless you want your health to decline (and that’s not good for anyone), is to start saying No.
The Whys of Saying No
You have to say No to at least a couple things on your list: say No to prayer group and the youth group, so that you can say Yes to school and the job. For anyone else reading this, you might have to say No to certain work projects, or community groups, or committees or boards or parent-teacher organizations or coaching sports or some other worthwhile activity. I know, it seems horrible to say No when these are very worthy things to do. It kills you to say No.
But the alternative is that you’re going to do a bad job at each one, and be stressed beyond your limits, and not be able to focus on any one. You won’t be getting enough sleep, your focus will get worse because of a lack of sleep, and stress will compound that problem.
We stay in this state because we really want to do it all. We have this idea that we can be great at everything, and succeed at all that we try. But we are human, and we have limits, and we have to let go of this idea of doing everything and doing it well. You’re either going to do a couple things well, or do everything poorly.
Do a Couple Things Well
Ideally, you’d find complete focus and do one thing well. You’d pick one really important thing, say No to all the rest, and put your complete focus on this one project. This might be school, or a project at work, or a volunteer project … but just one thing. You’d learn to do it well, and get better and better at it, and serve people exceptionally. However, that’s not reality. We can’t always pare things down to one thing, so focus on two. I’ve found that you can do two things well, and one thing really well. With two focuses, you won’t be as concentrated, won’t learn as deeply, but it’s doable. With three or four focuses, you won’t do anything well or learn anything deeply or serve anyone exceptionally.
So start paring down to two things: figure out what the most important two things in your life are, and cut out the rest. Be ruthless. Call or email or meet with them now, and tell them that you really want to help, but your plate is too full. You can’t serve them well, so you need to say No.
When you’re down to two things, I’ve found it best to give each some allotted time. So a few hours for one, and then a few hours for the other. Don’t switch back and forth constantly between the two (an email for one, write a paragraph for the other, go back to email for the first one, a paragraph for the second, and so on). Doing it that way means you never give either your full concentration. When you give something your focus, really be present.
Saying No to worthwhile projects, and letting go of the idea that we can do everything, is very difficult. But it’s not more difficult than trying to do everything and not getting enough sleep and being overly stressed out. Saying No is hard, but it means you say Yes to focus and sanity.
This Week I'm Making... Pad Thai Salad
Talking of full plates, here's another quick and easy recipe that you might like to try. It's full of colourful, nutritious, raw ingredients that will increase your health and vitality. You'll get more than the recommended "5 a day" and, if you add some marinated tofu you'll get a good amount of protein too. You can buy ready-made tofu by Cauldron Foods in most of the big supermarkets.
The ingredients list is long, but don't let that put you off - the only preparation is chopping the vegetables and a little whizz of the dressing in a food processor.
For the Thai Peanut Dressing:
- 2 dessertspoons of peanut butter
- 1 tablespoon rice vinegar*
- 1 tablespoon fresh lime juice
- 11/2 tablespoons olive oil
- 1 tablespoon soy sauce
- 1 tablespoons honey or maple syrup
- 1 garlic clove, chopped
- 2cm square piece fresh ginger, peeled and roughly chopped
- 1/2 teaspoon salt
- pinch of crushed red pepper flakes
- 1 tablespoon fresh flat parlsley leaves
- optional - I added a spoonful of coconut yogurt to make the dressing a little more creamy - you could use natural or Greek yogurt if required
* I used white wine vinegar as I didn't have rice vinegar
- 1/2 a small red cabbage chopped
- 1/2 a small green cabbage chopped
- 1 carrot shredded or spiralised or chopped into small sticks
- 1/2 courgette shredded or spiralised or chopped into small sticks
- 1 red pepper, thinly sliced into bite-sized pieces
- 1/2 a cucumber, halved lengthwise, de-seeded and thinly sliced
- sprouted seeds - I used alfalfa which you can buy from greengrocers and some supermarkets
- optional - add some stir-fried, marinated tofu for a bit of protein
And here's how to make it:
Make the dressing by putting all the ingredients except the yogurt into a food processor and blend until you have a smooth paste, then stir in a spoonful of yogurt if required.
Mix all the vegetables together then divide into bowls, add the stir-fried tofu, spoon some dressing on top and serve - super yummy and extremely good for you!
This Week I'm Visiting... Indaba Yoga Studio,18 Hayes Place, Marylebone, London NW1 6U
Indaba means "gathering", and this London studio has gathered together many different teachers to provide many different styles of yoga - from Iyengar to Power Yoga, and Headstand Workshops to Beginner's classes, there's something for everyone here. Indaba has 2 spacious studios, a comfortable reception area where you can buy drinks and yoga related items, and very nice changing and showering facilities. Click here at www.indabayoga.com to take a look at their website and their hugely varied schedule of classes and pay them a visit next time you're in London.
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| Savasana at the end of class in one of the lovely studios at Indaba |
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| The great sign outside Indaba Yoga Studio |
If you've followed my blog since I started it 11 months ago, you might remember that I planted some lily bulbs in pots back in February http://thrive-yoga.blogspot.co.uk/2014/02/the-yamas-of-yoga.html. These were very successful, giving me wonderfully scented flowers for a long period over the summer. If you planted some yourself you might like to know about the aftercare and how to keep the bulbs over winter so that they regrow into healthy plants next year.
When the lillies had finished flowering I removed the pots from the patio and put them round the back of the house. I left the foliage to die back naturally so the nutrients from the leaves went back into the bulb to provide it with energy for growth next season.
It's now time to remove the dead stalks and tuck the pots away somewhere sheltered for the next few months so that they don't get waterlogged and rot. I tuck my pots under a yew hedge which keeps them free from snow and the worst of the rain but allows the soil to stay moist. They've survived like this for years. I add a layer of compost and grit mixed together for extra protection and nutrients for when they start growing again in spring and reward my minimal effort with abundant flowers again in summer.
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| The lillies and the Buddha outside my Studio |
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